The weirdest dream

I had the weirdest dream last night. 

I dreamt that HS told me that we aren’t friends; I’m just her financial adviser.. 🥹

And then the weird dream continued with news saying she passed away and I wanted to go see her.. but I had died too, and couldn’t open the “door”.. but then Joleen and Jiamin saw me (even though I was invisible to others) and helped open the door. 

It was pretty scary coz it shook me up at 5plus .. 

I asked ChatGPT and what it says sounds pretty enlightening. 

Even though our paths have drifted, but it still hurts. And I wasn’t even that super super close to HS too.. 

And the upcoming wedding party probably contributes to it too.. lol.. 

I realize that I didn’t invite many of the people that were v impt in my life 20yrs ago; not even my maid of honor or one of my emcees.. cause our paths have drifted.. like parallel lines and never crossing again. 

I contemplated inviting some of the old friends from that season; but I held back. 

I didn’t want to end up exhausted from socializing; I wanted to see friends who are important to me and friends who can carry themselves; hahahaha.. basically friends who would understand.. but ya I guess the guest list cause a sub conscious alarm in me. 

Not inviting more people coz it’s my party. I just want to keep it small, keep it within people I love now. 

Though it was still pretty sad that many of my old friendships have died.. 

I guess that’s why the 情景 of why I’m invisible to the crowd but Joleen and Jiamin could still see me.

🤣🤣🤣

This is an example how being high empathy is a pain 🫣