Emo...

Got up this morning feel ultra sick.. Flu, cough n a pair of super sore breasts tat signify tat it's coming anytime.. Not tat I can't cope w my menses, it juz irritates me when the breasts r so sore tat they become hard like iron balls n the mere touch of it hurts.. Y can't mine come w/o symptoms? Or y can't it cone but not as pain? Especially when in recent mths the pain has been quite intolerable..

Got so emo tat I missed my prayer meeting this week.. N woke up at 11.. Feeling all of the above, I Thot today will b a black Wednesday.. But uncle pig called.. Maybe he sensed it this morning tat his queen is not well, or maybe it's an act of convenience.. He called n saved me.. He asked if I wanted to c a doc, which I said no..then followed by sayg tat he's reaching in 5mins (sweet surprise) to bring me for lunch, n if I can, mayb do movies? Thank God for uncle pig! Else today I would juz turn out to be a hermit, hiding in my room with no lunch n juz waiting for time to pass..

As I wrote this entry, emotions flowed.. Like what if he didn't call? What if we didn't get marry? N what if we hadn't met each other? I know it sounds pretty exaggerating but right now I'm juz so thankful for him.. Don't tink he realize the stuff but never mind..

Hopefully we really do get to watch a nice movie after lunch...maybe we can go catch it at cineleisure

Reminicising our memories...

Juz had an appt at cineleisure.. Hvnt been to this place for a super long time.. Muz hv been at least 6yrs since I came here.. 
This place had always have a special place in my heart bcoz this is the place where uncle pig n I had our first date! It juz seemed like everything happened yesterday but 11yrs have passed.. Haha..
We were colleagues n he had organized a movie w me n another colleague. That colleague had told me earlier tat she was going to 'fly' the eVent coz she wanted to play a trick on him. She had suspected tat uncle pig was wooing either one of us, which i was totally unaware of.. 
Anyway, as I was reminiscing the past, I wondered if our lives would be different if my friend didn't fly the date; or if I had also fly him then mayb we won't be together ? Maybe n maybe n many maybes...

A little prayer IV (19/4/11)

I finally decided to cancel the search mission and announce that I've lost the receipts. It took me a while, cause I was still hoping that somehow somehow they will appear when I come back to office today. Anyway, I called the client today and told her the truth, the whole truth.. that I've misplaced it...

The client didnt sound quite angry; but then maybe its bcoz the whole truth havent sink in to het yet. As for me, I'm just relieved that I've finally said it; despite the many reasons that I shouldnt. Cause the fact that I lost something so impt really reflects v.badly on my professionalism.. the thought of just simply blaming on the courier system to the insurer; or juz shifting the entire blame to my PA did TEMPT me. And thus the prayer in my earlier entry.

But while I was writing this entry, and a look @ Joy seals it. As a parent, I hope that I can tell my girl that mummy makes mistakes too, but we all muz have the courage to admit it. And honestly, it takes more than one can imagine to make this step. I was telling J earlier today that this incident caused me a lot more distress than a complaint case by an unreasonable client a few mths ago. That's because I know I was not wrong at the previous incident (even though if really convicted, the trouble would be much bigger...but of course, the co. investigated and cleared my name la), but this one, clearly is mine.. even though the amt on the receipt is quite small, and I would more than gladly offered to reimburse the client on my personal account, but the fact remains that I would appear unprofessional for losing a document. I'm not sure if my honesty would cause the client and her friends to cast a different light, but I was glad that I eventually said it. And Thank God for the message on Wed!

A little prayer III (15/4/11)

Lord, I pray that you help me remember where i put the receipts.. i pray that you give me the wisdom to find it. If i really cant find, then give me the courage to say the truth to the client, Lord give me the right words.. Lord I pray that I will not hide or say any half truths but that I will say the real thing. Yes, I've misplaced it and I'm willing to face the music.

- amen-

A Little Prayer II (14/4/11)

Two Kinds of Wisdom

 ¹³ Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. ¹⁴ But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. ¹⁵ Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. ¹⁶ For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.
 ¹⁷ But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. ¹⁸ Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness
(James 3: 13-18)

So true right? Juz when I prayed for wisdom for my afternoon appt, the message at nighte during CG talks about this: Earthly wisdom or heavenly wisdom? Which wisdom do we choose? What is doing the right things? Sound judgement? Lord I pray that I have the wisdom to choose the right way, that I will not be so caught up in the rat race but to choose U. Lord I'm thankful that I chose to pray for the right things this morning and I know that's most impt. Lord, I also pray that you continue to be with me & my family, that You guide us thru our walk & that Lord, people will know of You thru us, our ways & acts. Lord, I pray for my young believer colleagues, that a young seedling continues to grow in Yr word . Lord, I also pray that You heal her of the brokeness in her heart & let her know that the focus should be on You. Lord, I pray that you give me the wisdom to say the right things to these people so that they will get to know you.

- Amen -

Re: A little Prayer

Dear Father in Heaven,

Lord, I pray that you give me the wisdom for my appt; that you'll be with me. Lord, I surrender to you. Lord, I just wanna do a good job as an adviser, to give glory to you and I know Lord, You will take care of the rest. Lord, I know that in all things, I just have to be assured that You will take care of it. If so Lord, I just pray for Yr wisdom, that the right words will come; so that the appt will be assured that she's in safe hands; just like I know I'm in safe hands.

Lord, I pray that you protect the members at the prayer meeting today. Lord, I pray that you cast away the bad nightmares suffered by one member; Lord I pray that You bring those that didnt come today, come the following week; and those that's late today to arrive early next week and Lord, most importantly, those that have yet to know You, will know You soon, that more will come and know Yr Name. In Jesus name, I pray
- Amen -

Re: Prayer Meeting

Just had our first ever company prayer meeting, organized by few of my colleagues. It was good, refreshing, and also nice to hear some young christians' testimonies. Super encouraged by one of them, who shared about how my sharing (a few months ago) encouraged him to pray before every appt, and how God uses him and help him with the words to flow out during the appt. I'm so happy for him, and that this really touched me too! It's like another full circle.. how I've been a little bit down recently, but with his sharing, I'm so superly blessed.. and glad that he's accepted Christ too! - Amen-

Close encounter with Cancer

Uncle pig (which I've addressed him fondly since uni days.. moving forward, he will be known as uncle pig la..) had his appt @ TTSH.. We agreed to meet there at 1130 so tat I can go w him but this man ah, went to clock in n completed his appt by 11am! Anyway, w our relief, the doc says it seems to be a viral infection, which they say has no medical cure now (sounds scary right?) but it's not CANCER la.. No tumors no nothing.. So we are thankful! Thankful for:
1) God protection on this situation
2) Our friends tat prayed for us, especially my CG
3) allowing us to appreciate things n each other.

Through this situation, can also see the weak side of uncle pig.. How a giant crumbles down n it was a humbling experience for all of us. It was a close encounter with cancer... something tat's not taught in textbooks or in any courses that I've attended.. but because of this, there was nothing much we could do or prepare for.. we just had to rely on God wholeheartedly.. and that maybe this is also the reason I understand what it means by COMPLETE surrender to the Lord..it's like in the old times, when people are sick and there was no cure, they had faith, faith that Jesus will heal them and cast all ailments away.
It's the same feeling here, that when there's really no route left, then just have to believe in God.. really!

I'm also thankful tat God chose to send me this message in the midst of all this, that it is in His right timing, to direct me to the adoption process. Well, now tat everything's kinda settled, we should b starting it pretty soon! Haha...

p/s: Been busy recently with TTSH, and alot of work... so been quite delayed in my posts.. have so many things tat I wanna blog but I have yet to post them.. sorry! Had to re-edit this entry too.. coz the office internet didnt squeeze me in juz now..hahaha... anyway, God is good ALL the time!

Inspirational Verses

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.
- James 1: 2-4

How true it is, especially for Christians, to remember this, that every trial, every challenge is from God, to let us have a chance to grow and develop us to the fullest potential. I noted this verse a few weeks ago during Sunday's sermon 'cause I hope that this will carry me forward, in times of despair. I'm alright now.. even though after 11 days of suspension, my period came. I was not as devastated as previously, which came as a shock to me too.. hahah... but I'm thankful for that as well. Anyway, when Pastor Chui shared this verse, I was so happy. Happy that its such a beautiful verse, that God's with us in ALL times and that when all is over, we will be good!- to be continued

Eve of TTSH

Will be going to doc appt tomorrow .. Mixed feelings.. I don't know how hubz is feeling right now- lord I juz ensure this into Yr hands. Tat I know you will have a solution for us, n tat U r with us in all times. Lord I do not wanna speculate or guess anything bcoz You are the creator of all things n tat You are the Provider for all. Lord I pray tat you give us strength in Undergoing this task n tat we will all come out stronger n better out of this situation. In Jesus name I pray, 
-Amen-