Our daily bread

As I was waiting this morning for an appt to arrive, I looked thru the week's schedule and started to panic. This week is a very relaxing week and next week is an empty week. Before I start over reacting and go to a full panic mode, I decided to look thru our daily bread, which is something I try to do regularly.

The verse today is on 2 Chronicles 20:12, where the King, even though he is facing his enemies, choose to look at the Lord, and have trust in Him. The story unfolds and shows God unfailing reliability and how the war is won even without a fight.

How sweet the story is and how suitable it is for me. I've always wondered why God placed me here , for an introvert to be in the sales line, for someone who doesn't even enjoy being in the limelight , or even in crowds. But He chose me, to do what He has planned, so that plain Jane can do well in the sales job, so that others know that it is only possible because of Him.

I've always wanted to share with others my testimony but always I find it a struggle, to strike a balance between hard selling God and sounding insane, vs giving God his due credits. So in the end, I didn't. Which isn't what it should b. God I pray to you, that you give me the words to touch the lives of others so that they come to know you Lord. God I pray that you give me the wisdom to speak the right words to my clients, to share with them about You and also how important it is to start planning on earth and also for the future (Heaven). Lord, everything when i feel lost, I pray that you strengthen my faith and guide me in yr ways, that when people see my struggles, they see your works in me too. Lord, I pray for my friends who are nursing a broken heart that you mend their hurts and you made them complete again.  I pray that they will get to know you Lord, in Jesus name I pray, amen!

Our God, will you not judge them? For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you. - 2 Chronicles 20:12

Post- Retirement

Following my heart to heart talk with joy, i began to explore seriously on the aspect of stopping work completely; aka retireing. The initial thoughts were excitement and curious. I mean, to really liquidate all the assets and perhaps buy a 3 room flat with the monies from CPF. Then hold the balance in cash and slowly deplete it till the day we passes on.. would that be doable?

I started to go thru my household expenses, "the needs" expenses that cant be removed and "the wants" that we can do without. I went thru the assets and their potential cash values as well. Anyway, that's a tedious process, which I will be doing.

What do I do when I retire?
In the meantime, i also started to think how will i spend my remaining days if I were to retire now.

Things to do after retirement:

1.  zzz till shiok and wake up at lunch time to pick Joy
2. Watch Korean drama till shiok when the kids are sleeping
3. Be a housewife and starting learning how to cook and do the housework
4. Volunteer either @ PL/ Charity organization / church
5. Open a biz completely not related to what I'm doing now
6. Pick up a hobby

As I list down the things I can / want to do after retirement, I realize something. These aren't the things I really want/ enjoy doing. Well, at least not things I want to do for the next 50 years. No, I shouldn't be wasting my life like that and becoming obsolete even earlier than most of the retirees right? I realized something even more profound, not realizing before I even start on this entry: I am currently doing what I'm most passionate about, the thing I enjoy most doing:

Financial Advisory

Much as I don't want to admit, but these days of soul/ post retirement searching made me realize that I'm actually already in the work that I enjoy most. As I come to this realization, I also told william that it actually took Joy to make me realize that the sole reason why I'm doing what I'm doing now is because I started this work because I wanted to help others. But maybe it's the many years of doing the same thing, or the recent long working hrs, that resulted in me forgetting about it entirely, or the recent Depression attack, that made me dread it so much. But yes, I do enjoy my advisory work. And yes, I do not see myself working in any other job other than this. Nonetheless, I'm thankful for the realization. It has made me more at peace with myself, and relieved me of the stress of working. So yes, working for another 50 yrs here or till further notice.

Thankful for God, who is always here with us and guiding us through the journey. :)