Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Emo day..

Have you ever have friends who happened to be clients? Those that kinda "supported" you when you first started this biz, but after a while, you stopped reviewing them for work bcoz it was too tiring and frustrating to do so? The reasons could be many, but for me, it was becoz it was frustrating to always having to wait for > 45 mins for each appt, and/or having aeroplanes in the midst of it.. meaning for every 10 appts we scheduled, i probably only managed to meet them twice, and of the times when we finally met, it was always after waiting for > 45 mins. And in the end, I finally decided not to meet any of such appts in 2009/2010 coz I was battling depression due to infertility and the emotional rollercoasters (due to infertility/ aeroplanes) were extremely hard. I thought since I couldn't control the former, i should at least control the latter. I thought it was easier to meet strangers for they view you independently as an adviser, no strings attached. (the-dun-like-to-meet-strangers-story is for another day)

Anyway, I do have a handful of such people, and I stopped meeting them after a while. Not meeting for work first, and eventually when our paths no longer cross, we also seldom meet for catch ups.. and every once a while, when these people popped up in my mind, the feelings are mixed. I like to go back to them, be it as a friend, or be it bcoz of my work obligations. But I was afraid. Afraid of not knowing what to say/do, afraid that the same disappointments come back again.

But this 2017, I want to overcome this. And I'm meeting a friend/client this friday as a review. I searched thru the records, and the last time we did a review was in  2010! The last time we met as friends were in 2012! I felt bad as an adviser, having neglected my initial crop of sheep, especially since they were the ones who "supported" me before anyone endorse me for the work i do. And it's scary to think that we are meeting this fri. What should I say? work first or friend first?

Praying to God for His widsom and guidance on this situation. May He provide me with strength to carry on with this appt!

Trust in the Lord with all you heart and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.[aDo not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil.This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones. - Proverbs 3:5-8

No comments: