Where did my bun bun go?

It’s the Mar holidays so we took time off to spend with the twins. This morning was supposed to be cycling with grace but last minute, both of them said they would preferred to watch an anime movie. So off they went. 

Had lunch at HDL before we splitted ways. I took grace to Chinatown coz she needed to get some crochet supplies. Suddenly dawn on me, she’s now a tween, and not the “bun bun” we called each other affectionately. Why did I take so long to realize it? She’s quite often the “forgotten child” coz she never had problems academically + have quite a lot of friends + doesn’t have as much meltdowns. So quite easily, I’ll forget. And it suddenly struck me that I’ve definitely lost a lot of time with her. 

I wished I could turn back the clock. 

This is us this afternoon. She used to spam my phone with 2000 of her photos and always I’ll remove all, leaving one or two of them. 

Us in may 2021, when she still loves taking 2000 selfies. 

She doesn’t complains even when she doesn’t receive as much attention or time with me. Most of the time I “fire fight” with the other kids or with work. She just does her own things. And now her addiction is probably the phone or computer. Something we need to work on. 

Just had a night chat with Joy - the teenager who I hardly see nowadays. Her schedule is so crazy packed that I wonder if she knows her first priority is still A levels, and not build an exciting and colourful CCA portfolio. She’s running for council, and to be honest, I hope she doesn’t get it. Too much work, with no pay. JM says she’s probably very much like her mom - the drive and the crazy schedule 😳.. anyway while hearing her campaign and conflicts etc, I wonder when will the twins reach this stage where I can b confident and comfortable with them. When can we chat like friends and I can b 放心 with everything ? 

We also went to the night safari this evening. The twins have been requesting for this for a long time. When we finally completed the whole tram ride + show, I asked the twins when was the last time we were here. They clearly wasn’t impressed with the whole event - a sign of “Aging”. They have outgrown it. 🤣🤣🤣 And so when I tried recalling the time we brought them here (coz we only came once!) I remember it was before Covid, so it’s probably in 2019 when they were P1! Gasp! Certainly didn’t expect that their request has been postponed for so long. And all of a sudden, the mum guilt overwhelmed me. I felt bad, for neglecting them and not doing all the activities we should do as a family. They said that they aren’t interested to come here again, and that maybe we could just renew our zoo membership. Asked them where they would like to go, and we will try to go before they outgrow it again. And they said USS! So I guess we will bring them there in June. 

Ended the night with Mac.