ER 29/8/11 @ 930am

Procedure was done in a sec.. Coz I was kinda knocked out within a while n by the time they woke me up, it was completed. The nurses here are nice, juz like the time when I had joy.. Warm n hospitable. Thank God for them, which made everything seem more ok.. Now waiting for the anesthetic to wear off before they can discharge me. Waiting for my breakfast to come too! Haha.. Kinda miss the food here when I was delivering joy 4 yrs ago.. Haha..
Thank God for everything.. Not sure abt the extraction results and don't wanna worry abt tt coz I know I'm in safe hands. Amen!

ER (Embryo Retrieval) 29/8/11 @ 645am

Dear lord I pray that you accompany me to the procedure. For someone who's so afraid of pain, you protected me thru these 4 weeks of daily jabs, making it seem like a breeze. Lord I pray tt u oversee this whole process n protect the hearts of my 2 precious: uncle pig & joy.. They hv been a continuous source of support n they r also praying for what are heart deeply desire - another child. Lord I know u love them more than I do.. And I trust tat you hv plans in place for all 3 of us. Lord give me peace to go thru the rest of the leg.. In Jesus name I pray, amen

Miracles

Suddenly thought about this song when I woke up this morning and decided to find it. Enjoy!

Lyrics for When You Believe by Whitney Houston & Mariah Carey
Many nights we’ve prayed
With no proof anyone could hear
In our hearts a hopefull song
We barely understood
Now we are not afraid
Although we know there’s much to fear
We were moving mountains long
Before we knew we could

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe
In this time of fear
When prayers so often prove(s) in vain
Hope seems like the summer birds
Too swiftly flown away
Yet now I’m standing here
My heart’s so full I can’t explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I’d say
There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

They don’t (always happen) when you ask
(Oh)
And it’s easy to give in to your fears
(Oh…Ohhhh)
But when you’re blinded by your pain
Can’t see your way straight throught the rain
(A small but )still resilient voice
Says (hope is very near)
(Ohhh)
There can be miracles
(Miracles)
When you believe
(Lord, when you believe)
Though hope is frail
(Though hope is frail)
It’s hard to kill
(Hard to kill, Ohhh)
Who knows what miracles,you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will(somehow,somehow, somehow)
somehow you will
You will when you believe
You will when you
You will when you believe
Just believe…in your heart
Just believe
You will when you believe~

ED1

The Emo Day..
It's coming to a mth since we started on our daily dose of injections.. It's been quite smooth , on the whole.. Till we went for our visit on mon n dr commented the growth of the eggs were a little sluggish.. Huh? I Thot it was so far so gd? How did it suddenly become sluggish? He suggested increasing the dosage of Puregon from 150mg to 200 mg n hopefully things will get better. Egg retrieval which was initially estimated to be either thur or fri might be delayed. We are to c him again on wed and c how.

Wed came and it was confirmed.. Sluggish.. My heart sank. Most likely there will only b abt 8 follicles ready for retrieval looking at their growth. On one hand, it's gd news tat I didn't get OHSS or too many eggs tat made breathing an issue . But on another hand, the no of eggs is definitely much lesser than wat we had expected. If there were only 8 follicles, n assuming tat not all follicles contained an egg, i might b looking at 6 eggs? And I shudder to think at the end how many would b successful embryos for me to put inside.. Haiz..
Tears flowed as these thoughts passed my mind.. The first day (ED1) when my emo got the better of me.. Nice uncle pig told me tt we should surrender to the Lord, tt we will continue to do our best and trust in the Lord tt He will do the rest.
Yes, I agree.. I had worried deep in my heart initially, that I will hv too many frozen embryos and they will b wasted n it juz seem like a life forsaken.. And I prayed for just the right no. Of embryos . And I shall pray again now.. That the Lord, my God, does not need many to start w, to create the little miracle in our lives. He knows our needs, and He provides. It just take 1 to be successful, if He is willing.
Yes, we will surrender completely to Him and adhere to His guidance.

And going a little further, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, "Abba Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will. - Mark 14:35-36

ivf read

This is by far the clearest of the IVF procedure that I've found on the web.. Saves my explanation when I explain to my friends what I'm going thru and the stages.. Go read...


http://www.victoriafertility.com/14p_in-vitro_fertilization.htm

Simple Happiness

"Happiness isn't about what happens to us -- it's about how we perceive what happens to us. It's the knack of finding a positive for every negative, and viewing a setback as a challenge. If we can just stop wishing for what we don't have, and start enjoying what we do have, our lives can be richer, more fulfilled -- and happier. The time to be happy is now." - Lynn Peters

Bumped into this verse when I was flipping one of Uncle Pig's old old books and it struck a chord in me. It's so true, how sometimes we always wish for a situation or something that God could give us, in order to be happy. But more often than not, it's not the result of a situation that will lead to happiness, but to look at every current situation, and smile. To be able to look at the little blessings at each situation, to be able to smile, and to be able to give thanks, is what we should do in life. And I'm trying to do it at the best I can, trying to be happy, optimistic every day, every hour and every second. And for this, I'm grateful, that God has guarded my emotions so far.. there was no major emo days and I'm just counting every day and looking forward to every day as it comes. This is simple happiness, I guess. =)

My Protein Diet

Today is the start of my protein diet. Under the advise of many in forum, it's best to start doing my egg whites at this stage. As it will reduce the bloatedness of my tummy and reduce the chances of having OHSS (Overian Hyperstimulation Syndrome). The "recommended" amt that one should consume is about 10 per day!!! Yes, 10!! I got a shock too, when I heard it. After telling Uncle Pig about it, the enthuastic guy went to buy 90 eggs and now they are sitting at my living room. Haha.. anyway, he cooked 6 today, and I've already eaten 3 for breakfast.

I've always been a fan of eggs, half/hard boiled eggs.. coz with the dark soya sauce, it always taste nice! Not sure if my palatte has changed recently, but I find it hard to even finish my #2 egg white,  much to imagine 10! Will pack them for lunch/tea/dinner later.. hehe.. to my lunch/tea kakis, you can always share my eggs now..hahah...

Right now, I pray that God will protect me from OHSS, as people with PCOS (me) is even more prone to getting it.  Lord, I surrender to you, and leave this IVF to your control. I pray that you protect me from all negative thoughts, and that you protect my womb, so that I will have the right no. of eggs, eggs that's healthy. Lord, I also pray that during this period, I will continue to seek you, that I will continue to praise you, for your Goodness. Lord, I pray that during this period of time,  my work will be stablised and I will be able to focus. I pray that I have the energy to explain the details to the clients and I pray that they will see value in the work I do. Lord, I also pray for William's biz, that you continue to give him wisdom in solving all the issues there, and I pray that you protect this household. In Jesus name, I pray
- Amen-