Joy

That day, while we were walking home after her tuition, I hugged her and told her I love her.. her reply was " mama, did u do anything wrong?" Before running off to open the gate.

Her reply was too much for me to take it.. lol.. did I not express my love for her often enough ? Or has she become an adult before I realize?

So before I forget how my baby is still my baby, thought I better record the "development milestones" of my 小朱。

Joy

She is 10 this yr. Omg! 10 yrs juz fly past in a dash ya ? She is the 大姐 in the family, always taking care of our needs. 

There are so many things I'm thankful for after having her. 

1. I'm thankful that she makes breakfast almost every weekend. Pancakes, prata, scones, and even omelette. Yes I'm showing off that this kid cooks better than me. 
2. I'm thankful that I don't need to chase her to do homework like her peers. 
3. I'm thankful that she will entertain/babysit her sisters while William and I sleep in for the weekends.
4. I'm thankful for her independence 
5. I'm thankful for her presence.  She has changed and taught me more than I can ever imagine. 
6. I'm thankful that I'm her mom
7. I'm thankful that she's my firstborn. I often tell my friends that bcoz she was first, I was encouraged to have more than one child

Despite all the shortcomings, mommy loves you my dear and let's continue to walk this journey together.

Confinement Food

It all started when I saw a big green papaya sitting in the kitchen. I ask uncle pig what was it for, and he said he was waiting for it to ripen before giving it to the girls.

"Oh.." I sounded disappointed.. thought he had wanted to use it to cook green papaya fish soup for dinner/supper.. yes, it's a popular confinement dish but it's also my favourite soup. And it has been soooooooo looooooog since he cooked it. I couldn't recall the last time he cook it.

So ta-da! At the request of the Queen, the chef has managed to cook it for me today. Hahahahaha.. i like it with lots of parsley and mee sua.. that's why the green vegetables on top... I don't know if it's becoz the papaya are not orange this time round, so it didn't taste as nice as before? Or maybe becoz it's not my confinement, so uncle pig anyhow anyhow.. hahahah... but i'm still grateful that he made the effort.

I remembered that this soup requires a lot of effort during my confinement, coz he needs to go to the wet market super early to "book" the fish bones and also get the fresh fish. then he needs to cook overnight with lots of red dates and gouqi zi.. it reminds me of the tough days we had during our last confinement and despite the tough days, he still took effort to prepare my confinement meals every day.. 那时虽苦，可是一路上有你。

#touched #老公万岁 #backpost

Jeremiah 33:3

"Call to me and I will answer you. I will tell you great and mighty things you do not know. " Jeremiah 33:3

This was joy's "power verse" yesterday.

Each week, the kids in sunday school would have to memorise a power verse and also write a short 感想 of the verse. She had forgotten about this homework and was doing it in the car while waiting for the twins to finish their art class. It was not a difficult task for her coz she can usually memorise chunks of passage within a short span of time.

I was more curious on what verse it was and wanted to participate in the learning. Well the difference between a Christian kid and a Christian adult is that the adult are not given homework to memorise verses, which might not be exactly a gd thing. Anyway, took this time to memorise it too as I like how fitting it was. Was glad that I manage to do it under her guidance- 没有丢脸。she say I would forget it by the end of the day - she was right.

Thus I decided to pen it down, so that I can refer to it easily the next time.

Happy weekend!

Happy valentines day

I told mr choo that someone in office gave me flowers today and took a pic for him. His reply was : " cheapo lor..shld b in nicer packaging and why isn't it rose?" Wow.. hearing his reply make me laugh..hahah.. sour sour.. although I was glad to hear his reply..hahaha...

It's valentines day and I had clearly forgotten it, if not for the fact that he made a sumptuous meal the night before. He said he read my schedule and deduced that I was only available yday for dinner. Thus the sumptuous dinner.. to me, everyday can b valentines day la.. and u don't need a day to specially b chopped at the restaurants or florists.. it can b simple fare too.. such is the me now..

On a side note, becoz I had forgotten about the significance of today, so I actually have quite a few appts in the far West.. jurong West..hahah.. a client called me last week saying that she would like me to meet up with her brother in law and their family plus her mil to review their existing plans.. my client wanted her relatives to top up their coverage. Long and short of it, after meeting up with thr whole extended kampung, I concluded that their current plans are best suited for them. Even though their plans weren't as comprehensive as that of my client, but their current plans were most suited for them and I told them honestly there was no need for any switch or upgrade or changes.  The extended family were shocked.. they were paiseh that I came all the way down, but there was no biz for me. I even helped them applied for giro, so that they didn't have to pay manually next yr. Once a while, such incidents come by where I do bona fide. My client was surprised that I didn't ask her relatives to pay more to get more etc..but I explained to her that needs were different and they didn't need what she has. Full stop. I was happy with what I said and even after leaving the appt while reflecting in the car, there was nothing that I would do to make it different. This is me , and this is how I conduct my biz. To some, it would b a waste of time, especially to crawl all the way to the west and vet thru all the policies and didn't recommend anything. Maybe to others, I'm not a producer since I can't convince them to buy something fr me. But to me, I can say that I'm a financial consultant, not a sales person. Of coz, I can easily push them to change or upgrade or whatever, but what's the point if it's not in their best interest ? Then how different are we compared to the salesman on the streets ? One of the appts I feel gd even without closing..

Happy valentines day to all !

How much do I need ?

While having dinner with my extended family on 元宵节， i was talking about going car-less when the current car expires; which would be in another 4 yrs time. My bro was quite shocked..so was a very close family friend. Both felt that with kids, having a car has become a necessity than a want.  My bro, in particular, felt that we should abandon that idea since "it's not something we couldn't afford".

Perhaps it's true.. be it traveling with kids, or be it in terms of the affordability aspect. But my thoughts were quite simply because firstly by then, the twins would b 10 yrs old and joy would b 15. Certainly by then the transport system would b even more robust compared to now. Secondly, becoz they r bigger, the Amt of barang barang that we need to bring would b greatly reduced..so the car becomes more of a want than a need. Thirdly, I would want the kids to be less reliant on cars. Maybe I think too much, but I don't want them to think that the car is a necessity when they start the workforce and thus be caught in the rat race. My bro is right in the sense that yes, we are more than able to still afford the car, but would our kids be able to afford given the increasing  cost of living?  As it is, most kids in sg has never seen the hard life that our parents or grandparents live in, and are unaware of how $$ comes from. My kids think that every time mama needs $$, she only needs to go press a few buttons at the machine aka Atm and $$ juz spurts out easily. 😂
This isn't what I want my girls to believe.
I used to live an extravagant lifestyle, only allowing William to bring joy to cafes or restaurants. To me, food courts were dirty and challenging to bring a toddler to, not to even mention hawker centres! Haha..Yes, that's me 7 yrs ago.. the-since-I-could -afford it, then y not ? After all, I certainly need some indulgences in life after working so hard, isn't it? Must we be living a lifestyle based on how much we earn or should we be living a lifestyle based on how much we need ? The me now believes in living a lifestyle based on need basis.. the only extravagant item that I'm still paying is the twins preschool, which will end in 2 yrs time. Yeah!😁

Anyway I've digressed..Haha.. lastly, it's for environmental reasons la. Let's all help cut down the CO2 emissions and lower the usage of energy. The family friend is a family of 4 and they hv 3 cars, my bro family has 2 cars..all 不环保.. hahaha.. I shall do my small part in saving the earth today..

Letting go

Learning to let go is hard. Trying to forgive is harder. A biz provider screwed up my / client query till it dragged for months. I had the right to be angry and I'm pissing mad. Mad that no one had the initiative to care enough to follow up, mad that perhaps no one felt I was impt enough to give attention to. And when one is mad, it affects all other areas of work/family/life/everything.

I'm still contemplating if I should be the 君子 and not pursue further.  As long as they settle the issue now and move on?; or #2, press further and complain all the way up so that someone big enough knows. I know if I choose the latter, I will still continue to b angst over it, till the whole thing settles. And it certainly isn't gd for my well being. But if I let go juz let that, then will I be at the losing end?

Guess I'm still human after all.. even though my God gave His all to save sinners like me, but to replicate that is so HARD!!!

Praying for my heart to let go, praying for forgiveness that I was so angry. Thankful that I have the Lord who love me with no conditions and extend his grace to me.

P/s: I've decided to forgive by press time, bcoz it's for my better well being. 😊 thankful that I didn't dwell in it for too long.

幸福是什么?

幸福是什么?在我眼里，幸福就是当我忙碌地在跑我的 appts 时，看到一盒热腾腾的晚餐在车上。对我来说，这就是幸福。虽然意大利面很简单，可是我还是很感动。知道他现在是忙到连睡觉的时间都没有，可是还会怕我又因为没时间而没吃晚餐。感恩。

While trying to gobble down my dinner before the next appt, I heard this song over the radio 。
It's by Sandy Lam : 

《至少还有你》

我怕來不及 我要抱著你 直到感覺你的皺紋 有了歲月的痕跡 

直到肯定你是真的 直到失去力氣 為了你 我願意 
動也不能動 也要看著你 直到感覺你的髮線 有了白雪的痕跡 
直到視線變得模糊 直到不能呼吸 讓我們 形影不離 

如果 全世界我也可以放棄 
至少還有你 值得我去珍惜 
而你在這裡 就是生命的奇跡 
也許 全世界我也可以忘記 
就是不願意 失去你的消息 
你掌心的痣 我總記得在那裡 

Just find this song so suitable to express how I feel at this moment. A lot of friends have been asking us how are we coping, be it if it's because of the big shift, the smaller space or being maidless. And my reply would be "actually not too bad". To be honest, we are coping much better than what I had expected; even when the floor is always littered with hair every now and then; or when our dog has been having pee accidents almost every day or when on some days, there's mountains of clothes waiting to wash>dry>fold/iron>store.

To me, all these didn't matter.. as long as we are staying together as a family, healthily. Ever so thankful for all the blessings in life, big or small; as long as we are together. Amen !