Protecting Boundaries

Yesterday, one of my advisers SOS and asked if she could have a crash course today at 11am about a particular product. 

The usual me would have say yes immediately. After all, it must be an emergency. 

But I stopped myself. Instead, I suggested that she come for my afternoon team training so that I can go thru with her. 

I’ve taught this product several times in office before. But she didn’t attend. 

She said she couldn’t attend the afternoon session and will find her way out. 

It’s a struggle to say no. But 2026, I want to be more protective of my time and the people important to me. 

I don’t know when or how long it started but my priority list / time allocation for 2025 somehow became:

Advisers -> Clients -> Family -> William -> me

I said yes to any of my advisers who needed an emergency training, case study, or anything. My time with my kids suffered. My marriage too. And lastly, I had only scraps for myself. 

I was burnt out, felt like a rabbit chasing my own tail. My client appts suffered too, cause I hardly had much energy to think properly. Each appt goal was to end it ASAP. 

So after a session with my coach, I’ve set out healthier hrs and boundaries for each area that’s important to me. 

I’m thankful for the break now, so that I can think clearly. Thankful that I can take a pause and not feel guilty. 

To many more learning lessons ❤️

Reflections 2025

Had wanted to book a date with myself again, in a cafe and do my annual reflections, but time spaced me out. 

Nonetheless there are so many things to be grateful for in 2025.

1. My kids and I survived 2025! 🎉 looking back, we more than survived! We SLAYED!!! 

Relationships got better. I had more time with everyone, except grace. The last couple of weeks kinda reminded me that I really should spend more time with her. 

2. My marriage. Thankful that God protected and guarded over our marriage. We got lazy over the years, but I’m thankful that we managed to talk abt it and putting more effort into it now.

 

3. Work. If you ask me 2 years ago, if I would be able to lead and grow the IWM today, or to even lead with such confidence, I wouldn’t have thought possible. Ever so grateful that I stepped into this unfamiliar turf, and grew so much! Learnt so much over the last 1 year and got so fulfilled growing with them. Even if I were to drop dead today, I’m thankful for all that I’ve done. Hahaha.. morbid but ya. 

4. My work kids. The final figures aren’t out yet, but I know the few that has confirmed hitting their best year ever. Proud mama moment. 

So thankful for the opportunity to lead, inspire and touch lives. God, I’m so grateful for you, for sending angels to guard over me, when I was fearful, when I was tempted, when I was unsure. God, I pray that You continue to lead me, as I lead your sheep, so that more can come to know you. In Jesus name I pray, amen! 

Small steps

 I love swimming. But I haven’t swam in mths. 

Sick. Weather. Overwhelmed. Just didn’t feel like it. 

Didn’t feel like crawling out of my comfy couch. Wanted to 躺平 til the end of life.. 

But I did it today. Walked out of all the “weeds” trying to convince me not to. 

“U have 4 appts today. U should prepare them” 

“The son will be upset if he finds out u swam without him”

“The water is too cold” 

一千个理由。 

I’m tired of being a sofa. I wanna walk towards a healthier self. Step by step. 

The first dip into the pool. 

Damn. The water is soooooo cold. 

Did my first lap. 有一点吃力喔. Argh…I’ve been a sofa for too long. 

Did 16 laps for today. Not my best. But celebrating the small win. 

I need to remember to love myself; and also to take care of this body of mine. 

Even when she’s still grieving, she doesn’t show it at all. 

She continues to show up to be the 大姐for her siblings, to help jaga Joash while William is out for his gathering. I know she’s crying inside and her way is to bury it so that we wouldn’t worry about her. I wished she wouldn’t hide it.

God, thank you for sending joy to us. I pray that you lead us in this journey as she seeks you, that we remember of your faithfulness everyday, every part of this journey. I pray that when one door closes, you will open the right doors for her. God I bring that You bring hope to her, that she be reminded that in everything You are in control. 

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭12‬:‭9‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Joy lost the scholarship again for the second time. 

It was heartbreaking. Heartbreaking not because of the loss but coz the officials told her that the appeal was accepted, raise her hopes only to have the medical team to reject her a second time. (Her medical condition deems her unfit for military even though she passed all her physical tests with flying colours.)

She cried even harder this time round. It’s as if the floodgates were let loose. In her desperation, she said she isn’t going to apply for any more scholarship. Just going to get a local degree. Get a normal job. All the 气话。🥺🥺🥺

No amount of consolation would touch her. She just cried inconsolably. I could see it eating her alive. She just kept going on and on abt how much time she wasted preparing for her UK application and scholarship interviews and in hindsight she shouldn’t even try. 

My heart broke together with her. It’s not like her to give up when things don’t go her way. So her reaction was 💔💔💔

There was nothing we could say to console her. I know eventually, this would seem a minor setback when she lives a full life to 80. But now, this was everything she wished and worked for. It was her everything. 

We could only cry together with her, hug her, give her a safe space to rant, to cry, to feel all her emotions. 

BBQ on a hot Monday afternoon

The ladies came over and we had a great time chatting. Never thought that we would click so well. 

I thought my closest friends would just be J&Jm but 缘分 pulled us together closer. 

It’s funny coz towards the end of the party I was already on hibernate mode and they noticed it and suggested leaving. Hahahha.. but I was fine w them chilling by. Just that I was too tired to make any conversations. 

Thankful for the friendship. ❤️❤️❤️

It’s especially cute to see the toddlers able to play well with each other too. 

Couple trip part III

The one week honeymoon ended. Was quite thankful to be back home towards the end. Coz I was starting to feel sick, and bored in China. Hahahaha.. 

It was a good break, a good pause to just focus on the man, even though in his POV, I still worked a lot while on the trip. Hahahaha.. oh well.. 

Trying to either approve cases using my small phone or reply clients / advisers text.. this is his evidence 🤣🤣🤣

Thankful to be able to spend this 1 week focusing on him and him alone. Thankful that even though we didn’t tick any awesome Michelin food, or bought a lot of stuff, it was good just to enjoy each other presence. 

It was good to sleep early and it was good to wake up naturally (although my naturally is still abt 7ish). 

We took so many pretty photos, cause he said I will need it for my LinkedIn articles.. hahaha.. 

Funny old man. 

May we continue to grow old together. My man.