Wednesday, February 1, 2023

Traveling anxiety

I’m officially in the emo + sleepless state. Started to have flashbacks of eventful crying many yrs ago, when I cried uncontrollably on the way to pick my parents to the airport. I was bringing them on a holiday but without the kids or uncle pig. I cried so hard that my eyes were still swollen when we reached. The twins were less than 2yrs old and grace was still latching to sleep that time. After that incident, it got much easier and I had clearly forgotten how hard it is to leave a baby at home. 

Fast forward and now I’m bringing my mom to Iceland in less than 2 weeks. This time without the baby boy. I know he is in good hands with uncle pig and the girls helping around. But the mums guilt is intense. The anxiety was killing me alive. I know the trip would b nice for my mom, coz it’s our first trip since Covid closed all incentive trips. She’s been looking forward to it. And I know that I should bring her around while she is still healthy and mobile. But post retirement, she has turned to be rather critical of me especially, and I’m not even sure if I can handle her for the entire 9days. I’m hoping the colleagues would provide some form of distraction and I’ll bring a book along to distract myself from her criticisms. 

Work is still pretty quiet but I’m at peace. I know that He is in control. 

Praying that I’ll be able to spend quality time with her on this trip, and maybe share the gospel with her too. Praying for journey mercies and that I’ll be able to sleep well on the trip. 

“I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭40‬:‭1‬-‭2‬ ‭NIV‬‬
https://bible.com/bible/111/psa.40.1-2.NIV

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